Kelly Brook: "A Stick With Tits"

Three years ago today, June 3, 2007, we posted an admittedly uncharitable commentary on Kelly Brook. Among other things, we called her a "nobody," and we said her boobs were "horrible."

We also dissed her fiancé, Billy Zane. This is dumb, because he could kick our ass. But it's OK, because they broke up in 2008, although now she's dating a rugby player (Danny Cipriani) who could kick our ass and Billy Zane's ass, and your sorry ass.

Anyway...this week we saw a reference to how "Kelly Brook has finally posed nude!" And we consulted Eyebrowpedia™ and sure enough, found out that these photos (supposedly a big scoop by Lad Mag or something) were actually from Arena, and appeared in 2005.

So look. We apologize for saying all those bad things about Kelly. We still don't like big (ok, giant) boobs, but we bet she's a fine girl overall. Are you listening, Mr. Cipriani?

Kelly Brook, Nobody

Who is Kelly Brook?

She is an underwear model with big, horrible boobs and good eyebrows. She is Billy Zane's fiancée too.

In other words, she is nobody.

To paraphrase Peter Clemenza (RIP), "Leave the boobs. Take the eyebrows." And click for larger images.